James has been my client since 2008. He followed me from one town to another for yoga classes. He never missed yoga and live music Sunday “church” with me and my husband Kalá. He brought his kids to kirtan, studied Bhagavad Gita with us, took teacher training and never missed a master teacher when they popped into town.

Then he signed up for Soul Mapping Mentorship.

What did I say to him on his first day?

James, you’re the one who gets in the way. You see the landscape as dry and lackluster. How do I know? Because I am the one who gets in my own way.

Here’s a little secret: it literally hurts my soul when something isn’t beautiful.

I’ve come to learn that this is a natural, non-violent but often excruciating samskar, a mental impression. James has his own samskaras, and even after a decade of association with me, he needed to get up close and personal with his own story. He needed to see, hear and feel his own imprisoning matrix, to get to the other side.

So what do you do, Jai? he asked.

I Soul Map.

Like all the time. In the car in the parking lot getting triggered as hell. Like in almost every conversation some days. Anytime and all the time, I sit, stand, or lay there and go through my Soul Mapping Matrix. It’s dangerous not to! I, like everyone, need to relax. I need to pivot. I need to stop my migraine from exploding.

You and I, we need to stop the impending doom inside of us.

James heard me say it many times over so many years but he had embody it. He had to commit. He had to own his own matrix, and the soul mapping process that would reclaim his sacred sovereignty. For real and forever.

His actual identity was actually bliss.
You can’t live someone else’s life. You have to go through the portal being presented right now.

Perception shifts. The landscape of our minds and hearts don’t have to match reality in the 3rd dimension. We must pivot to what we want, all the time, in the moment.

That’s the secret.

During one session, I say to James, there is a sanskrit word aparadha, to go against Love. Does this word resonate?

YES! he said every trigger, every moment of pain, it does feel like I’m going against love.

And that was a huge embodiment. A huge shift. He had to feel it. It was his language.